-Hey, barman! Please call me a pisatel, dramaturg ,regisser
-Yes, sir. You are a Grishkovec

-Hey, barman! Please call me a taxi.
- U vas xui vidno!

-Hey, barman! Please call me a taxi.
-Америка сосатть

О, Вы из Англии!

Правильно bartenter

mixologist why not this term , епта
or even intoxicologist —

-Hey, barman! Please call me in zhopa vstav.
-Yes, sir. You are a peedoras.

Hey, batman! Please call me a Joker.
Gde detonator?!

Bartender

-Hey, barman! Please call me a taxi.
-Yes, sir. You are a taxi.
But he's already shifted to tranvay.